Wrestling, Mixed Martial Arts, Comics, Zombies and Bacon
The Best Day I Ever Had
I haven’t really posted anything lately. Had I not been busy being lazy, I would/should have posted something about how it’s awesome that Uncle Teddy died. Maybe I could mentioned how ACORN has been figuring out ways to get prostitutes home loans so they can bring underage illegal aliens to work in makeshift brothels.
No, I will simply talk about the most fun I’ve had in one single day.
In about 2002 I met a girl I had messed around with was then the recent past. She probably would have liked to date, but since I don’t like spending money on broads that option was off the table. I met her at her job, followed her to house. Upon arrival, I banged her. I then took a shower and was close to leaving when she suggested getting something to eat.
At this point I figured it would be OK to get something, as long as it involved a drive-thru. She wasn’t all that great looking, but she allowed me to stick my penis in her, which is a quality I greatly value in a woman. She drove, and insisted on paying.
Hard to argue with that logic.
Upon the return to her place (never do it at your own place unless you have a temporary residence), we ate what we had ordered. Then, I banged her again, left, and never talked to her in person again. It worked out for both of us.
It was awesome.
This video has nothing to do with that story, but it’s amazing. Watch it once, then watch it again and you’ll see that it gets better as you learn the dance and some of the lyrics he’s singing.
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| Print article | This entry was posted by Couch Pirate Pump on September 16, 2009 at 9:24 pm, and is filed under Features, Pump. Follow any responses to this post through RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site. |

about 11 months ago
Great article, but never show me any of that..ever..again.
about 11 months ago
There are more stories, but that was probably the best one I could really put out there.
Dude, Big Macs and poontang make a great afternoon. Let nobody tell you otherwise. Leaving afterwards, well that’s man-nirvana.
about 11 months ago
I loved this story. I am proud to have and call you a “Vault” buddy.
about 11 months ago
Still the Bonercorn, huh?
about 11 months ago
This guy may be the Bonercorn’s sidekick. Waldo Boy.
about 11 months ago
Pump, you make me laugh to no end.
about 11 months ago
That guy looks like he’s got either Parkinson’s or epilepsy.
about 11 months ago
What he’s got, is a fucking Where’s Waldo tatt!
about 11 months ago
What else could you really do with a third nipple?